Flourishing amid restrictions

Old friends

After all the planning, the talking and the apprehension this was the heart of my trip—sitting around a table eating delicious food and hanging out with three old friends. When you have known people for many years and experienced all kinds of life events together, there’s a real sense of being known and accepted for you are. It brings comfort, support, understanding—and no pretence. Our time together was nourishing in so many levels—filled with laughter, trust and sharing.

This lunch was in Dishoom in the new Kings Cross development—so popular that it does not take reservations in the evenings and people just queue. It’s phenomenally trendy with a buzzing atmosphere, a hectic ambience and wonderful food. We weren’t the oldest people there, but we were older than many of the clients and quickly got used to being addressed as ‘you guys’ by the super-efficient serving person. Our need for reassurance that there was a lift to the cloakrooms is obviously not something that is often required but cheerfully explained. It was all extremely enjoyable and a lot of fun. However, later in the day when we needed to sit down and have tea and cake, we surrendered our hard-won places in a fashionable eatery and settled for the café in Waitrose where there were very few people, lots of space and no-one bothered us!

It's such a relief to have no need to be cool!

Passenger Assistance

This is a whole new world. Once you get over feeling like a package that is passed from one place to another and relax into it, things work well. You’re transported everywhere in a wheelchair, so there’s the extraordinary experience of flying through customs and passport control and never having to queue. You do need to find a moment if you need to pick up any refreshments because it’s not factored in. I can see there’s an art to making it work best for you—especially becoming familiar with the differences between country’s approach. One woman in the UK was slightly confused and ended up not eating for hours.

The people who operate it are, for the most part, interested in the journey their charges are under-going and like to chat.

Transferring from the airport to a railway station at Luton airport, there was a short delay near a ticket barrier, and I was left sitting in a wheelchair in the cold. The young man on duty at the barrier took the time to wheel me over to where heating came through the floor and to make sure I was comfortable. He treated me like his gran, which was somehow very lovely.

Coming home from Stanstead there were three of us headed for Amsterdam and needing P.A. We met up and separated at various collection points but there was a humorous moment when the three of us were in our wheelchairs waiting to be boarded and we started sharing travel stories that were easiest for people needing assistance. One woman generally took the train through the tunnel from the UK to Europe but there had been works at Amsterdam Central Station and the change at Brussels made the trip too long.  Another one was tempted to try the ferry and see how that worked out. It was so sweet, these three women parked in their wheelchairs completely undaunted and planning their next trips.

Family time

It was tremendous fun to get a taste of an English Christmas again—they really do it thoroughly in the UK. Stocking up on Christmas goodies in Marks and Spencer’s is obligatory of course, along with visiting their lingerie department. It’s odd the things you miss about your home country.

I managed to see the whole Cambridge branch of my family—the Norwich branch is saved for the next trip. Everyone was pleased to see each other. I was happy to see my nephew and niece who are both embarking on new directions in their lives, which I could at least catch a glimpse of. It’s hard sometimes to be the distant member of the family. Even though Amsterdam is not far away, emotionally it seems further because you’re not caught up in the everyday flow of peoples’ lives. Your visit is naturally an interlude in a certain sense—you want to connect but there’s too much to really communicate in the time you have.

Coming home

All the planning and research paid off handsomely. The trip was energising and boosted my confidence in managing my mobility restrictions. I learnt to accept a different style and pace but still with a sense of adventure. I like to push my boundaries and to try and grow through challenges and this trip was a great way to do that on several different levels. Digging deep for courage, holding steady when things felt overwhelming and embracing the nourishment it brought to me all amounted to an experience I am keep to repeat.

Have you managed to navigate any age-related restrictions recently? How did you feel afterwards?